Having Doubts...

I'm having big doubts for accepting my new job...

I've been here for 3 days now and I'm already feeling homesick. Maybe it's because I'm stressing out about financial situations or maybe it's cause I'm not used to living in a small town, knowing no one or maybe it's a combination of both. Whatever the reason is, I'm regretting my decision. I thought this would be a great experience for me but little did I know how much work and stress it was going to put on me. I can say with no shame... I broke down today. I broken down in tears cause I had enough of calling banks asking for credit increases or asking for line of credits and getting rejected but them all cause I haven't officially started my job yet or cause in my letter of employment it says I'm only temporary full time. I knew money was going to be an issue to beginning with but I know I will get reimbursed back. Just that initial stage of paying for everything is the hardest part.

However, I am happy and blessed to have such loving and caring people in my life. Whether it's people from my new work or my family, I am truly blessed to have people I can talk to and who will comfort me. I guess I do think too much sometimes, over analyzing things and making everything seem worse than it really is and puts me in more of a mess. I guess this trip to GP hasn't been the greatest since day 1... with my luggage being misplaced and not loaded on to my flight from my stopover.

I'm feeling a little better now. I talked to my brother and talked through some ways we can overcome this situation. I guess I should stop trying to figure things out myself and let people I trust help me out to lessen my burdens and stress. As I write this blog and as I think about it... maybe my move to GP is good for me. It's developing me as an adult and is teaching me life skills and life experiences that I would not get living in the comfort of my parents in a city where I'm comfortable. This change will be good for me... I just need to have hope and see the light on the other side cause I know this stress and burden will be lifted.

This was more of serious blog but I hope people will keep me in their prayers and will talk to me whenever they see me online cause I will need to talk to familiar faces, even if its over msn or facebook or what not.

I miss everyone back home... even though I'm coming back for the weekend, I think it'll just make my final flight to GP that much tougher to swallow. I now know the true value of my friends and family.

Don't be a stranger and leave a comment.